Psychic Bill On Immodest Mouse

2019: The first by-furries-for-furries song to hit number one enters the charts.
Mascot-suit sales soar, but the explicit take on The Lion Sleeps Tonight is largely considered derivative by critics. After a six week run, Jamie Foxx
once again tumbles into obscurity.

Psychic Bill On Toxic Clean-Up

2036: A bio-mechanical processing factory, thirty miles off
of the Colombian coast, accidentally dumps twenty-thousand tons
of cocaine into the Pacific. A newly designated task force deploys
71-year-old Charlie Sheen, wearing only a life jacket, to absorb the spill.

Psychic Bill On The Future Of Bad Ideas

2016: After 20 years of running a successful blueberry U-Pick-It farm,
Dan Mcillgis, of Brush Prairie, WA, decides to open the first U-Slaughter-It ranch.

Psychic Bill on Qualifications

2018: With the landslide election of an aging Carl Weathers, the American
people make it clear that the sole qualification necessary for becoming
a state governor is an appearance in the film Predator.

Psychic Bill On The Teary-Eyed Future

2029: The first wave of Emo nostalgia hits, likely sparked
by the release of Mattel’s retro Silently Weeping Barbie.

Psychic Bill on The Future Past

2032: 3D becomes the next big thing in the entertainment industry,
but the fad quickly fizzles out after a series of underwhelming
releases are rushed to market.

Psychic Bill On Victory

2104: The first time a clone of John Wayne wins an Oscar.

Psychic Bill On Automatic Writing

2017: For three months, Ouija Blogs become all the rage.

Psychic Bill on TV’s Afterlife

2023: The first prime time show with a cast made entirely of digitally-resurrected
dead celebrities airs. Michael Jackson is dropped after the pilot, his true-to-life
re-creation being deemed as too unbelievable a caricature.

Psychic Bill on Grammar…

2056: Twenty-one is made the new minimum legal age to use ellipses.