Ape Laws Of Physics

7 Jul

Planet Of The Apes

Listen, I understand that questioning the logic of the original Planet Of The Apes is like weeping into the ocean, but there’s something that’s always bugged me. It’s a classic ending, but how exactly did half of the Statue Of Liberty get onto some random beach? Never mind that it’s obvious they crash landed in Utah, which is no little walk from New York – we’re talking about a 60,000 pound copper statue, even getting it from Liberty Island to the mainland would be a ridiculous task.

It didn’t just wash up on shore.

The thing is, I can’t watch that portion of the film without getting the mental image of either:

  • Nuclear explosions tossing the statue into the air and re-depositing it somewhere along the American east coast, like some sort of thermo-nuclear Krazy Kat cartoon, or,
  • The final battle that destroyed humanity being a lot like Ghostbusters 2, and mankind was wiped out after animating giant statues to fight each other.

Krazy Kat

4 Responses to “Ape Laws Of Physics”

  1. bmj2k July 7, 2010 at 13:58 #

    The second film makes it clear that that Taylor and co. Landed in NY. You have to follow the mythology of the first two films (it gets messy with 3, just wrong with 4, totally messed up with 5.) As Zaius says “the forbidden zone was once a paradise.” In addition to full scale nuclear war, there has been full climate change, the likes of which actually have happened on Earth- witness ancient whale fossils found in Egypt from when the desert was once a shallow sea.

    Sorry to be such buzzkilling pain in the ass, and a geek to boot, but I am a bit of a Mr. Know-It-All on these films.

    That said, if Cloverfield could bowl the head through mid-town, I’m sure some gorillas could have towed it ashore to store their bananas.

  2. bmj2k July 7, 2010 at 14:00 #

    BTW- as you can imagine, no one will watch these movies with me anymore.

  3. JRD Skinner July 7, 2010 at 14:11 #

    I still don’t buy it – I understand that oceans can disappear leaving fossils, but half of the statue is obviously covered in dirt – how did enough ground get displaced to create a land bridge to Liberty Island, that was high enough to cover the 200, 250 feet of statue/pedestal that isn’t visible? In theory shouldn’t it look like it’s on a mountain or hill if the ocean has receded?

    I love the Planet Of The Apes movies, even as they grow increasingly incoherent, but I think the obvious answer here is ectoplasm. 🙂

  4. bmj2k July 7, 2010 at 14:32 #

    There you go, pulling the ectoplasm card.

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